Writing something seating in the office so late at night is really a different feeling. A feeling that I have grown up. A feeling that I have a major responsibility. Its beautiful sometimes you know. Its 11:20 pm. Cool na. But somewhere I am feeling drowsy.


I have grown UP. Y'day we went to Brahmaputra Bridge. Shob shomoye traine maa baba bhodla miya ba subhankar and jeet er shathe train e gechhi. Aaj upor diye gari kore gechhi. Ami boro hoe gechhi. Nodi. Srot. Aamari naamer ekta ongsho. Ato jor je? Ekdom aamar moto na. Jor aamar bhalo lage na. Aamar bhalo lage tej. Tej er shathe boye jae shob kichhu. Khushi, Dukhho... shob. Kintu oi ekta nouko Brahmaputrar shrot er ulto dike cholei gelo. Koshto kore holeo, she cholei gelo. Tar mane, nothing is impossible. Because impossible itself is I Am Possible. Bhalo achhi. Bhalo thakbo. Aami shob kichhu shojjo korte pari. So no worry. 

Story Continues.....

Miss Z was standing in the terrace. She was sad. Wanted to get involved in something to forget many things. But the home far behind has also put their curtains on. She is now unable to see the handsome hunk, the innocent princess, and their cute baby. This door also closed. Now Miss Z was aback. What punishment was this for? May be she knows the reason. She is not crying, but she felt like shouting. But whom to? No friends, some foes, pinch of happiness, barrels of woes? Is this a life to live? A tear rolled down the cheeks. 

Today I got a wonderful sms. Just forwarding this to all of my readers : 


People say they love rain.....but when it rains, they use umbrella.
People say they love sun........but when it shines they search for the shade.
People say they love the wind.........but when its windy they close their windows.
Thats why I get scared when people say 'THEY LOVE ME'.

The tears are not the same which it was used to be years back. But the pain was familiar. It was the same pain which I used to feel after hanging up mom's phone. It was the same pain which I used to feel when the rare emotional me knocked its existence. I am growing up. For the first time in life, I felt this pain for someone apart from my family. I am not feeling like lieing. I am not feeling like forcing. I am not feeling like crying aloud. I am not feeling better either. I am feeling worser. 1st thing. I have kept the most precious part of my life apart. Yes, again my fault. Because I could have stopped this to be happened. Nothing in this world is impossible.And on the top of that, I can see a vast gap being created day by day. I cant agree totally this time that this is my fault. It is no-one's fault. You know, what the simple conversation going on my mind before I rang up?


He : Kothae chhili? 
Me: Dekh na...  bhalo lage na........ matha gorom hoe jae. Kono mane hoe bol. Atto raa....
He: Thik achhe thik achhe. Age fresh hoene, raate kotha bolchhi.
Me: hmm. :(. ok
He: Pagli... porer bar theke ektu janie dish deri hole. tata.
Me. : Love u xxxx. :D. Aami call korchhi.


But sometimes these angers tell u how specially important u can be for someone. Na? 


:D

• MR. X FELL IN LOVE WITH MISS. Y. BUT MISS. Y WAS ALREADY SOMEONE'S EX.
•  THEY FELL MADLY FOR EACH OTHER.
•  DAYS INCREASED, LOVE DECREASED.
• DHISHUM DHISHUM............ OHHH............NO.........JHAGRA........
• AND MORE THEY FAUGHT,  MORE THEY TALKED.
• AND MR. X AND MISS. Y BROKE OFF.
• MR. X FELL IN LOVE WITH MISS. Z. 
• MISS. Z WAS EARLIER WITH MR. ETC. ETC.
• MISS Z HOBBY "TO SAY YES".
• MR. X AND MISS. Y IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER.
• WHO IS IN BENIFIT??? WHO IS IN LOSS???
• REPLY...........

sometimes u become so bound, that you cant do anything. and the toughest thing, u cant express anyway. because this bondage comes from the person who is the real meaning of your freedom. u cant smile,  u cant laugh, u cant talk, u cant cry. but trust me, there will be a day, when u will not feel like doing any of these. because by then, u have lost the most important part of ur existance, ie, ur emotions.

BAATEIN... (THE THING I MISS THE MOST)

PYAR HAI RISHTON KI BAATEIN,
PYAR HAI SHARTON BAATEIN,
PAR KISE PATA KYA KAMBAKHT HAI PYAR;
JAB KARNE CHALE IZHAR KI BAATEIN.


PATA NEHI THA MUJHKO BHI YEH
PYAR BHARI RAATON KI BAATEIN;
JAB NIKALI THI ZUBAN SE MERI
KHAMOSHI BHARI IKRAR KI BAATEIN.


AB RAATON ME SISKIAN BAN,
MERE AANKHON SE BEHTI MERI WOH BAATEIN.
KYON HUA NEHI SHARTON K BADLE
PYAR KUCHH WADON KI BAATEIN.

life is weired that u will never b able to find its true meaning. thats y I think searching for it is just a wastage of time. trying to be someone, being able to b someone and at last, to be someone. ufff...... a lot and a lot of journey. world says, its getting wiser. but i dont understand which wisdom directs u to be artificial when the nature is there. i dont find any meaning to cut the nature's arms when it extends its love. computer games and gym.... two  works of entertainment and exercise in place of a single game of marry go round. what a wisdom!!! my stupid brain doesnt understand. 


actually my empty brain is devil's den. because now i am hungry but i am seating in the office in front of some guests. i cant eat and i cant even show i am hungry. i dont again understand y i cant openly say that man!!!!! i am hungry............ dont they eat??? what a rubbish formality.

ANKHON NE EK GUSTAKHI KI DEKHKAR TUMHE,
AAJ US GUSTAKHI NE JAKAR LIYA HUME.


ISHQ MOHABBAT K DAERE SE KAB KI CHHUT CHUKI THI MAIN,
BAR RISHTON K BANDHAN ME DHUNDTI RAHI TUMHE.


AM I THAT STUPID OR LOVE ITSELF IS A STUPID THING? THAT PERSON WHO USED TO LOVE HERSELF THE MOST, WHAT IS MAKING HER FORGETTING HER SELF RESPECT? AM I GETTING INSANE? OR AM I SERIOUSLY AND RIDICULOUSLY IN SERIOUS SO CALLED BULLSHIT LOVE? THAT FILMY LOVE??????? OHH GODDD....... SAVE THIS INNOCENT CHILD OF URS.

Down with fever. But still at office. Its really beautiful as I felt relatives are always there. Just wana say that I am not alone.

life is crazy sometimes. its really tough to survive without the persons whom u love. known but so unknown city, with only work as motive creates a nostalgia that is tough to fight. 

anyways, working is the only way out to make the dreams a realty. sach bataun... i am enjoying. because, sometimes space is needed. but still i miss him, .nd yes, i am in love. its a happy feeling. 

:)

Having fun..... but a lot more is required to build a relationship. I am think life is that fair enough with me in this part. Anyways,,,, just waitng when God will say Hi...

:)

HELLO

All creatures in this world have beautiful things to experience in life. But very dew can diffrentiate between beutiful and ugly. And I am not among them. I have a very simple funda. Everything that comes your way is beautiful. If not now, then some other day. If not as realty, then as memory. Who ever thought that our seniour, whom we met just few days back in Head Office, is now with me chatting, so late at night. We became friends. Some beautiful things are certainly on its way.